emm...mau dkat jam 3 pagi sdh tapi sya masih x tdo2 lg....aish...amu oku kodop boo ti...men facebook pun boring...tgh2 subuh mcm ni tersangatlaa boring, sdh la x ramai org chat, benda yg mau dikomen pun xda....aishhh....mata pula xmau tdo....mau jg sya ambil Zoloft kut ini...hahaha jgn baa Pat..nda bagus moti itu....hehehe.... Dalam keboringan ini, meninguk la ba kunun sya msg2 sya d hp.....emm....blum lg sya padam msg c Spongy ari tu.....hmm....nda tau la mau c jadi apa ni, mau c jadi gimat mangkali..hehe.....fikir balik ttg apa yg dia ckp ari tu....mmm btul2 x sangka oo dia msh x berputus asa lg.....ini sdh masuk 3 kali sya reject dia secara baik....tapi dia masih x mau give up..malahan kali ni dia betul2 mau propose sya utk jadi gf dia.....huhuhhuhuhuhu....hampir jg iman sya goyah dgn proposal itu tapi nasib baik Roh Kudus masih kuatkan hati dan iman sya....AMEN!!! hmm....dia memg baik, sangat2 baik.....blh dikatakan dia agak memenuhi segala kriteria yg sya mau dlm diri lelaki idaman sya.....sya tau dia blh terima sya seadanya, terima segala kekurangan sya....cuma satu aja yg buat sya x dapat terima dia.....HE IS A MUSLIM....hmm....sya bukan anti-Muslim, tapi sya memg x mau terima kalo dia adalah seorg Muslim....kalo saja dia seorg Kristian, memg confirm sya akan terima dia...maybe sdh sya tukar status ni skrg....hehehe.....sayang betul oo....tapi xpa la....maybe bukan jodoh kami.....kalo bukan dgn dia pun ramai lagi lelaki d dunia ni baa...sya yakin n pasti, Tuhan pasti sdh ciptakan seseorg utk sya....yg sesuai dgn sya, yg boleh terima sya seadanya, n yg paling penting ialah, dia adalah seorg Kristian, seorg pengikut Yesus....(^_^) ya, sya yakin dgn Bapa...!!!
hmm....tapi sebagai kenang2an spya len kali sya blh baca lg, sya post la juga conversation kmi tu...hehheehe :
SPONGY: Tricia, i thought to tell u something but i don't know whether i have the courage.
PAT: Uik???apa itu??hmm this's what make my curiousity trigerred suddenly..hehe
SPONGY: Err err are u sure wanna know abt it?huhu hw shud i put it yeah.....='(
PAT: Ya, i do want...but it's up to u whether u want to tell me or not..i won't force u..it's ur right..=)
SPONGY: Emm....emm...
PAT: Hmm....mesti kamu nak bgtau yg sya comel ni kan tapi kmu malu2 lg....hahahhahaahahahaha....(perasan betol)
SPONGY: Bkn Tricia, tapi yae, kmu memang comel.... (uinaaa kambang trus sya time ni...hehehe)
PAT: Hehe thank u..thank u... tapi...apa yg susah sgt nak bgtau sya tu?curiga betul....
SPONGY: Emm.... Is t rite if i say "I LOVE YOU" ?? And i mean it....
duinaaaa time sya dpt ni msg terus berdegup kencang ni jantung sya....sya betul2 terkejut, mcm kena kejutan electric ni.....huish....bkn x pnah ada org kc luah mcm tu sama sya, tapi...ini mcm betul2 serius baa....kin takut ni...uish....then sya jawab cmni...
PAT: Hehe..knpa tiba2 pla ni? kmu bergurau yea? hehe...
SPONGY: If i said i am serious?
PAT: Hehe jgn ba..kmu ni memg suka kenakan sya...hehe
SPONGY: Haish Tricia nie, hehe lulus ujian..=P
Uik??huh....sya xtau apa maksud 'ujian' yg dia maksudkan itu, sbb sya tnya pun dia xmau jawab...tapi sya x kisah jg, sbb sya happy dia men2 aja....tapi jauh d dalam hati sya kata yg dia memg serius....tapi sya x juga perasan la, sya tau jg sya ni mcm mana...mana ada org sgup suka sya ni..hmm...seterusnya...
PAT: Ujian apa?? oo kmu memg sengaja kenakan sya yea...huhu
SPONGY: Jika sya serius pun, Tricia akan kata sya men2..kn?
PAT: Ya.. sbb sya tau sya mcm mana...i'm not deserved to get the words from a gud guy like u..
ya memg itu la yg sya rasa....sya x layak utk terima ayat itu dr seorg lelaki yg baik dan sempurna seperti dia....hmm...then dia jawab.....
SPONGY: Eh, ke situ pula...u deserve better, Tricia...jgn merendah diri sgt yae...kmu lbh dr apa yg kmu sangkakan....no doubt, that's the truth....
woo....terharu jg la sya bila dia kata mcm tu....tapi sya tetap x dapat terima dia....lpas tu dia propose sya.....sya reject dia dgn cara baik dgn mengatakan " i'm sorry for declining ur proposal to become more than a friend to u, but i just don't want to let anybody hurt, neither me nor u...sya syg kmu, kmu kwn sya....plus, i also love myself...jd sya x nak ada antara kita yg akan terluka nt... Lgpun sya jenis yg tetp, kalo dah mula sesuatu, susah nak akhiri...rasanya kmu jg begitu kan? Sya minta maaf, but there's a boundary between us...except for friendship, it's free from all that.. But, this is different case,,,, Just if u are.........maybe i will accept u..once again, i'm sorry....=(" Wooo panjang lebar ayat sya kalo mau reject org....hehe...sya bkn apa, sbnarnya sya takut dia mrh dgn sya, then bt apa2 yg x bgs....lgpun sya syg persahabatan kmi.....tapi syukurlaa....dia x ambil hati...dia masih blh trma sya sbg kwn dia lg, siap jadikan sya adik angkat lg tu....hehe....sya tau dia kecewa, tapi apa blh buat...sya x sanggup korbankan cinta sya pd Tuhan Yesus semata2 krna cinta dia....sya xmau jadi org kedua yg bt mama n bapa susah hati....hmm....
Masa perkara ini berlaku, sya ada rasa sedikit kecewa jg....sbb sya dapat rasakan hati sya ada perasaan ckit sma dia...tapi x la smpai frust menonggeng....hehehehhe..... tapi apa2pun sya bersyukur jg....sbb cinta Yesus dan bimbingan Roh Kudus mengatasi segala2nya.....sya harap
jika ada lagi 'dugaan' seperti ini terjadi pd sya, Roh Kudus x akan tglkan sya....=)
GOD, thanks for everything.....thanks for the strength u gave to my heart, that i could resist the temptation....i'm very proud to be declared as Your daughter.....i was born belong to You, and hence i will end my life in Your name....ALLAH BAPA, biarlah segalanya berlaku mengikut kehendakmu, bukan kehendakku....AMEN!!!....
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